too emotional?
Nov. 30th, 2003 09:45 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mrsbrownI haven't checked this, but my emotional angst rants may actually be PMS.
I've only suffered in the last 3 years. For the rest of my life I hadn't noticed any difference in my behaviour in the week or so prior to my period. I have a theory that its J's pheromones or something similar, 'cos it started after sleeping with J regularly.
I have generally allowed my emotions to have the upper hand in my life. that's how I chose to have a baby at 19, That's how I chose to stay with M for so long, it's how I've made most purchasing decisions, including my house. It's probably why I have such a hard time making myself stay at work- if emotionally I don't want to be somewhere, force of habit has to be overcome.
This isn't so good now that for one week in 4, I'm interpreting the world through a different hormonal paradigm.
so last weeks rant has to be re-interpreted. Part of it is about not wanting to look like a mother/older woman, and the other is the disorganisation of my clothing situation.
When you have to think every morning about what clothes you can possibly wear that you don't hate the sight of, and fit you and you think of the dress in your cupboard that you really like, but it doesn't fit you its time to do something. One option is to try and lose weight and angst about it, and the other is to simply reorganise your entire wardrobe and go shopping with a large wad of cash.
I think I will take the second option today.
Before I can do that however, I really need to draw my site context plan to take to the planning dep't of the local council on tues morn. and I wanted to make the shoes I now have a pattern for, and then there's making the pattern from my favourite pair of work pants. How will I decide what I want to do?
Emotionally, of course, when you've got too many choices it's the only reliable method.
*giggle* I just asked J what music I'm listening to. I have to tell you all what the medium is, because vinyl is alive and well , also future 'current music' notes may include notations such as 'cartridge transferred to MP3.' Apparently, the medium is as important as the music itself - it's the story*/giggle*
I've only suffered in the last 3 years. For the rest of my life I hadn't noticed any difference in my behaviour in the week or so prior to my period. I have a theory that its J's pheromones or something similar, 'cos it started after sleeping with J regularly.
I have generally allowed my emotions to have the upper hand in my life. that's how I chose to have a baby at 19, That's how I chose to stay with M for so long, it's how I've made most purchasing decisions, including my house. It's probably why I have such a hard time making myself stay at work- if emotionally I don't want to be somewhere, force of habit has to be overcome.
This isn't so good now that for one week in 4, I'm interpreting the world through a different hormonal paradigm.
so last weeks rant has to be re-interpreted. Part of it is about not wanting to look like a mother/older woman, and the other is the disorganisation of my clothing situation.
When you have to think every morning about what clothes you can possibly wear that you don't hate the sight of, and fit you and you think of the dress in your cupboard that you really like, but it doesn't fit you its time to do something. One option is to try and lose weight and angst about it, and the other is to simply reorganise your entire wardrobe and go shopping with a large wad of cash.
I think I will take the second option today.
Before I can do that however, I really need to draw my site context plan to take to the planning dep't of the local council on tues morn. and I wanted to make the shoes I now have a pattern for, and then there's making the pattern from my favourite pair of work pants. How will I decide what I want to do?
Emotionally, of course, when you've got too many choices it's the only reliable method.
*giggle* I just asked J what music I'm listening to. I have to tell you all what the medium is, because vinyl is alive and well , also future 'current music' notes may include notations such as 'cartridge transferred to MP3.' Apparently, the medium is as important as the music itself - it's the story*/giggle*
