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Acceptance and grasping opportunities
Apr. 5th, 2008 04:39 pmThis morning I was supposed to go to work. I have a huge project, thats more unfinished than finished and it was supposed to be finished yesterday.
Understandably, I was a bit stressed. Although I did manage to go back to bed at 9am for a morning nap. I was going to go to work after that.
And then my life intervened.
I ended up as the only person available to stay with Rose. OK, I thought. I'll do my work here, on my laptop.
Except that Rose has developed to the point where that doesn't work. She needed toast, then strawberries, then a drink or a book. I got progressively more stressed and frustrated with her and my situation, then I gave up.
I gave her what she asked for and then I sorted out some of our Festival washing and finally cleaned the worm farm so I can take it to work next week.
As I sat calmly on the back verandah, watching Rose clean the worm farm and play with the snails I collected off it, I realised that the secret of happy parenting, for me anyway, is acceptance. There's no point getting distressed about the stuff you can't do, you should just get on with the stuff you can.
And then MrPeacock rang. "Would I like to come to lunch on Bridge Rd with him and Sneetch?" [1] OK.
MsNotaGoth (who got her tongue pierced yesterday) arrived as I was finishing getting ready to go out, so she came too.
We had a lovely lunch and then walked home together, with a stop at the playground for Rose and, it turns out, my other children too.
MrPeacock and I played on the modern seesaw equivalent and I demonstrated that I am heavier than him, so Sneetch went to his rescue and then MsNotaGoth helped me. It ended with a splendid game of bouncing each other off and included Rose too as we swapped sides and stranded each other in the air.
Later, as I quietly enjoyed watching Sneetch pushing Rose on the swing and making her giggle, I realised that parenting is also about being open to the opportunities your children give you to spend good times with them.
It only cost me $90 and a day of work.
[1]MTB was supposed to take them out to lunch, but they had an argument and MrPeacock decided that he couldn't be bothered smoothing MTB through his hungry phase as they chose a restaurant, so MTB stormed off. MrPeacock sensibly decided to get what he could from the experience.
Understandably, I was a bit stressed. Although I did manage to go back to bed at 9am for a morning nap. I was going to go to work after that.
And then my life intervened.
I ended up as the only person available to stay with Rose. OK, I thought. I'll do my work here, on my laptop.
Except that Rose has developed to the point where that doesn't work. She needed toast, then strawberries, then a drink or a book. I got progressively more stressed and frustrated with her and my situation, then I gave up.
I gave her what she asked for and then I sorted out some of our Festival washing and finally cleaned the worm farm so I can take it to work next week.
As I sat calmly on the back verandah, watching Rose clean the worm farm and play with the snails I collected off it, I realised that the secret of happy parenting, for me anyway, is acceptance. There's no point getting distressed about the stuff you can't do, you should just get on with the stuff you can.
And then MrPeacock rang. "Would I like to come to lunch on Bridge Rd with him and Sneetch?" [1] OK.
MsNotaGoth (who got her tongue pierced yesterday) arrived as I was finishing getting ready to go out, so she came too.
We had a lovely lunch and then walked home together, with a stop at the playground for Rose and, it turns out, my other children too.
MrPeacock and I played on the modern seesaw equivalent and I demonstrated that I am heavier than him, so Sneetch went to his rescue and then MsNotaGoth helped me. It ended with a splendid game of bouncing each other off and included Rose too as we swapped sides and stranded each other in the air.
Later, as I quietly enjoyed watching Sneetch pushing Rose on the swing and making her giggle, I realised that parenting is also about being open to the opportunities your children give you to spend good times with them.
It only cost me $90 and a day of work.
[1]MTB was supposed to take them out to lunch, but they had an argument and MrPeacock decided that he couldn't be bothered smoothing MTB through his hungry phase as they chose a restaurant, so MTB stormed off. MrPeacock sensibly decided to get what he could from the experience.
